I feel the need to 'vent' (pun intended) about the shutter shades I'm seeing around more and more.

My dears... this "style" is a joke. Honestly... some designer (who was alive in the 80's) said "Guys... watch this... we'll grab these obnoxious foolish glasses I picked up at a flea market for .50 cents and put them on some model. We'll see how many non-thinking people actually think they're "Cool" and pay money to wear them!" (at which point several nasty, not nice designers joined in, snickering the entire time)

These were ugly in the 80s. They're ugly now. It's not the subjective 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' ugly. But downright, bone deep, ridiculously ugly. I know they're OH so 80's retro... but so are Harem pants... and honestly, you wouldn't want to be caught dead wearing those. (Even if you did go the entire way and toss on high-top Reeboks and 4 pairs of neon colored socks.)

First off, lets look at the sheer usability of these huge obnoxious things. They don't reduce the UV rays hitting your eyeballs. They don't block glare coming off of your hood while you're driving. There is no protection from wind, rain, etc. So the basic purpose of sunglasses are totally tossed out the window. You may as well wear frames with no lenses. This is all well and good when you're making a serious fashion statement. There are a lot of shoes in my closet that I would say "Not at all functional". Too high, slightly pinchy, make me teeter... but OHMYGOD they're so pretty! So, the fact that they're not all that functional doesn't matter... they do have a redeeming quality.

The look... Unless you are trying out to be an extra in some odd dork remake of Star Trek, there's simply nothing about these that are even slightly pretty, cool, retro, what-have-you. Every time I see someone in these all I can think of is why didn't they go the whole way? I mean, if you're going to wear a joke on your face, push the envelope and add the huge nose and eyebrows to the glasses as well. I could almost respect that.

All that aside, you can't see well in them. So now you're not only insulting me visually with your horrendous choice in face-wear... but you're putting me at risk by trying to drive your 98 Toyota Corolla while texting, putting on lip gloss, and attempting to view the road through louvered blinds.

I beg of you... do not do this thing. You'll regret it later.

I know.

I was a teen in the 80s.

While I was sporting my 17 strung together Swatch watches that artistically matched my "Frankie says Relax" day-glo tee, I wore these. Don't make the same mistake I did.

Years before I went "Web", I was a cosmetologist. (Fancy name for hairdresser). The hair thing was ok, but I really did like doing nails even more. The nice thing about being 'pro', is the the fact that we get our products for 1/2 of what you would get them for if you walk in and buy them in the salon.

I tried every fancy named 'salon' only product for my nails, primarily because I had soft, peely nails that never grew very long. I'd like to say it was just because my hands were in water a lot, but to be honest, I just have bad nails.

A few years ago one of the moms at my daughter's school told me that she uses Nail Magic. She had, of course, long gorgeous nails and I was horribly envious. I decided to try it, since I had tried everything else and failed, and POOF! Perfect nails. Twice a week I brush on Nail Magic, either over regular polish or just as clear... and they grow wonderfully, are very hard, and I always get compliments.

Now I KNOW I sound like a commercial and I hate that. But this stuff is really amazing. I've told friends about it, some have purchased it, some havent... the ones that have and are using it end up sounding like an infommercial as much as I do. The ones that havent.. well... I go and buy them some eventually (I'm starting a cult!).

This stuff has been around for a long time 37 years, to be exact. Nail Magic was awarded "The Most Outstanding Natual Nail Care System" by Professional Nail Technicians Across America. The reason? It works.

Its very easy to use. No odd systems or 15 different applications. Just one bottle does it all. Use it as a base coat, top coat or as a clear polish. No complicated, messy applications to worry about.

It's economical at only about $7.00 per bottle (which lasts me close to a year) After the initial treatment period, use it once a week not everyday like other more expensive treatments.

AND.. it's guaranteed.Try Nail Magic for 60 days as directed. If you are not happy with the results return your bottle for a full refund. Not a bad deal! You won't want to send it back, though. Trust me.

Now the downside. It's often hard to find. When I first started using it I could get it at most major Pharmacy's. Now? Not so much. I go to Sally's to get mine (because they carry the large bottle, not the weee little tiny bottle).

I will say that once or twice I've not been able to find the stuff and switched to something else. (Usually OPI) Within a month I had my sad, weak, peely nails back. Now I've stocked up on the stuff.

Truly, I'm asked all the time if I have my nails done.. if they're tips or sculpted.. I always say no, then proceed to do my Nail-Evangelist routine. Try this stuff out. You won't be sorry.

Recently the husband and I stayed in Boston for an overnight after a fun-filled party cruise with the co-werkies. Since we didn't have any particular place to go the next day I decided that we should head to Faneuil Hall market. (Way cool place to visit in Boston, btw)

I found a little store that was very much like a "Think Geek" or "Perpetual Kid" type of set up. Inside were toys, jokes, trinkets, kitschiness galore, and more fun "poke your coworker" type weapons than any place I've ever seen. I was simply in heaven! (Ok.. heaven was the Coach store across the street 5 minutes before.. but still.. I was riding high)

I bought two guns that simply made me giggle. The "NunChuck" and the "CataPult" by the same makers as the "Ninja Attack" gun featured. They work by slipping a little plastic nun (Or cat... but that's my husbands gun) into a plastic dish on the front of the gun, pull it back, close the cover and shoot.

Oh how clever and smug I felt strolling in with my NunChuck gun! I felt that if I couldn't aim well and pop someone in the temple, at least I'd get a laugh (and lets face it, engineers and pasty developers need to laugh a lot, or they get all dark, broody and somewhat emo - ew).

At the first opportunity, I sprang into action.. popping out from behind one of the cubes to take my design friend unawares! Yeah. And the nun went flying about 3 inches to land rather pitifully at my feet.

Did I need that sort of humilation?? Did I want to be in the situation of now having a rather sad, defunct gun (a one shooter, mind you!) as my only means of defense against the designer ...who was laughing hysterically enough to bring all the team droogies running (GUNS IN HAND) to his defense? NO. This was bad. I was Nerfed. I was Nerfed well.

As a result of that rather scarring experience, the gun (now used for decorative purposes only) and the little plastic nuns (which are going to be super-glued to push pins and put in the conference room) was found to be a cute idea, but falls flat in the execution area.

Now don't get me wrong.. I'm not saying don't buy one of this silly beauties! They're rather cheap and a funny little conversation piece. Just make sure you don't mistake them as decent office warfare weapons. They simply don't 'chuck' far enough to keep you covered.

Current my company has one rule, bring your Nerf gun with you to meetings or suffer the consequences....

Other than a few stragglers (Interns mostly... pfft!) my team is fully armed each day at work. We do not pull punches with our Nerfiness, either. There is no "Oooh I slightly pinged you in the fleshy part of the upper arm"... What I end up hearing is "AHHhh! That was my eye!!!", and nothing at all beats the sharp, slappy sound that the suction cup Nerf darts make when someone gets one to the cheek from 2 feet away.

But I digress... I had seen this particular Nerf gun online, and made it my mission to procure one for myself. I will say, not the best idea ever. The huge dart is really cool, although easily takes out a flat screen monitor (Sorry Michelle!) but the gun part? Nah. Falls flat. So difficult to use that by the time I got the thing to shoot I was already fully covered in Nerf velcro darts. Sad, really.

So currently when I interview people (Engineers, Marketing, What-have-you) I tell them to bring in on their first day the Nerf Maverick. It's a revolver type weapon with space for 6 bullets. Small, but excellent to keep on your lap during marketing meetings (Since you KNOW the engineers will be Ninja'ing themselves into the conference room to mercilessly shoot you til you cry!)

By the way.. I have all the Nerf weapons now except a very select few, so feel free to ask me which is a good choice. I'll be happy to expound on what a great team building tool it is!